Inside the Mind of the Micromanager (It’s Not What You Think)

I hear leaders described as controlling or micromanaging all the time.

Sometimes by their teams.
Sometimes by HR.
Often by the leaders themselves, with a wince.

But here’s what I see underneath that label more often than not:

You don’t want control.
You want trust.

And not the vague, motivational-poster version of trust.

You want the kind of trust that lets you sleep at night.

The kind that comes from knowing:

• things are actually moving forward

• someone is on top of the details

• nothing important is about to slip through the cracks

• you won’t be blindsided or embarrassed

When that confidence is missing, leaders don’t suddenly become power-hungry.

They become vigilant.

They check in more.
“How’s it going?”
“Just wanted to see where things are at.”
“Can you send me a quick update?”

From the leader’s side, it feels responsible.
From the other side, it often feels like a lack of trust.

And then everyone’s frustrated.

Here’s the part we don’t say out loud very often:

Trust isn’t something you decide to feel.
It’s something that grows when you have enough information to believe things will turn out okay.

When leaders are told to “just trust their people” without having that clarity, it puts them in an impossible position.

Let go… but don’t miss anything.
Empower… but make sure it’s done right.
Step back… but be accountable if it fails.

That tension is exhausting.

What actually changes the experience isn’t more control — and it isn’t blind trust.

It’s a different kind of conversation.

One where leaders and team members get clearer together about what progress looks like, how ownership shows up, and how information flows before anxiety kicks in.

When that clarity is there, something interesting happens.

Leaders stop hovering… not because they’re trying harder to trust, but because they no longer need to be hypervigilant.

Teams feel more ownership… not because they were told to step up, but because the expectations and boundaries make sense.

Trust stops being a personality trait, and starts being a shared experience.

That’s the shift I see change workplaces - one leader, one team, one conversation at a time.

💜Stacey

PS: Feeling misunderstood?  Like your current tools aren’t working?  Let’s talk.  Sometimes all it takes to break out of a bad pattern is learning a new dance step to try.